Monday, May 15, 2006

Student's List

Spatial Statistic and Econometric Paper: Check

Next: Counties Statistical Abstract

Friday, May 12, 2006

May 1998: days which will live in infamy*

*Quoting from the famous FDR speech about December 1941

From the late 1997 to early 1998, the student demonstrations were growing in the very fast pace. I can give a lot of reasons, about that phenomena, but that would not be the case for this post. I will try to give you some of the things that I still remember, or in this case, some of the things that I still feel about May Tragedy 1998.

I participated in some of the demonstration from 1997-1999. At the beginning, we were afraid, mainly because campus at that time was sterilled from any political demonstration or rally. The regulation is cleared, if students participate in the political rally, they will be expelled. Of course, this also give excotic reason why the student eagered to join the political movement. The army at that time is also harshed to the political movement against the president. Until now, I still remember the 27th of July 1996 riots in Indonesia Democratic Party headquarters, because it happened near my house and my university (I took short semester in June and July 1996). I witnessed how the army treat the people like garbage.

After awhile, when the student rallies became more solid everyday, I started to feel relax. Well, I still felt tear gas and occasional beating from the army when we did the rallies, but we were young and dangerous at that time. The most scary thing at that time, if the student activists is spotted, they can be kidnapped by the army. But as long as we stay together, we felt stronger.

Then, around May 1998, when the demonstration was already widespread, we were very busy to join the demonstration. Suddenly, in 12th May 1998, one of our meeting place for student movement (the basement of Faculty of Economics University of Indonesia Library, Badan Otonom Economica) got a phone call from our friends that several students died in the rallied today. What! Students died! How can it be?! When, we were settling down with our position, that kind of thing just hit us. Then, the student activists prepared for another rallied, with cautiuos. We were afraid, but also mad, and of course that event quickly became a momentum for students to strike back. After a lot of consideration, 13th May 1998 would be our mourning day, considering we don't want to have our friends, and ourselves, shots to death. Basically, we stayed in the campus to mourn the death of our friends.

But in 13th May 1998, I and Ben decided to go Trisakti to attend the mourning day in the place where the army shot the students. I promised my friend to come, and I just can't stay without seeing the scene of the crime. We went with motorcycle, and we could arived fast. Nothing extraordinary, I paid my visit to mourn, to meet my friend and as Arya already mentioned to check out Trisakti cute students.

After awhile, we noticed groups of people, not students, gathered outside the Trisakti University to see what happens inside the university. Students shot by army was, is, a big thing in Indonesia. When the crowds was getting bigger, the army get restless and they start to disperse the crowds with tear gas and water bomb. The tanks were ready for them, if somethings happen. The students were mad, and started to yell at the army. Then, the army also shots tear gas in to the campus, and threat the students. Bacause the crowds can't get closed to the campus, they retreated, but when they retreated, they started to burn everything that they passed. They threw building around the campus. Hell, they almost suceeded burning the gas station near the campus. Then, the situation get out of hands, because the students couldn't contain the crowds. That was the starting point, before the hell broke loose.

In 14th May 1998, UI students planned to rally inside the Salemba campus, but we didn't dare to go outside, with army stand ready outside the campus. Again, at that time the crowds gathered outside Salemba campus. Then, the crowds started to get restless, and they went amok.

In a couple of hours, Jakarta started to lit, I can see the burned building everywhere. when I saw Jakarta from above the building, I could see smoke everywhere. Outside the campus, I can see people burned cars, especially army cars and Timor cars. Also, from my mobile (my notorious Erricson GF 317) I received news: the amok became racism riots, the crowds strucked the chinese race people and their properties. I, we tried to chew what happens outside, but it was simply beyond our ability. Then, we started to call our friends, to help them, to tell them to stay put in the safe place, etc.We set up an information centre to contact our friends who joined today's rally, whether they were safe or not. During that time, the news about amok kept feeding us with terror. I could see the horror from the body that kept cooming to the mortuary that located next to economics building.

I saw Menteng Prada cleaned by the people. Some of the students manage to calm the crowd in some places, but in general Jakarta was burning. I remembered I called Beby to know how she's doing. She had to walk from around Salemba to Sunter, because there was no transportation at that day. She told me the crowds plundered the small shops. She told me passionately, well actually furiously, how the crowds plundered Chinese property in Cempaka Putih, Cempaka Baru, Sumur Baru, Sunter Jaya and Petak Sembilan, because people in that places are poor, maybe even poorer than the people who plundered. At midnight, we were tired mentally and phisically, the only thing that we could do is smoking (just to remind Arya, we managed to get cigarettes from one of the warung(street vendor) free of charge, because the owner didn't want our money, the old lady event offered us soft drink, again free of charge, we run because we felt guilty to have something free from street vendors, hehehhehe). By the way, where is the fucking army and the police, they supposed to protect the people, they just fucking dissapeared.

15th May 1998, I stayed at my house, I was dead tired. My parents talked to me, discussed the situation (well, at those time, I wasn't stayed in my home often). I tried to relax, actually in my neighborhood the place was calmed, in order to enter our neighborhood in Menteng we have to showed our ID at those times. We watched news in television, actually I've enough all of that, but hey, we have to know about outside world. After that, My father and I were strolling around the city to see what happened. It was a mess, road blockade everywhere, people gathered with hand weapons. They are tired, but ready to attack. We have to open our windows, sometimes get out from the car to explain our purpose of trip, and this was in the centre of the city (Menteng and surrounding area). Many of the cars and the buildings are burnt. Again, we saw the horror that we had seen in television.

The days after that filled with another demonstration, another analysis about what had happen, the impact of the riots, political implications, racism in Indonesia, and bla bla. But again, like my friend said we might never forget the May Tragedy, the tragedy. Although the student movements became stronger from that day, but the tragedy is still haunted me and my friends, until now.

Nowadays we joked about the demonstration, the student movement, we tried to supress the horrors, among other things May Tragedy and Semanggi Tragedy. We always laugh, because if we look back we had done stupid things, funny things, and other things. But again, we can't surpress the tragedy easily from our conversation, although we tried to talk about then in a funny ways.

I think we should't forget those days, it will make our country grows by learning from the history, even the dark one.

May 1998, eight years ago: days which will live in infammy...

For the rememberance of the May 1998 victims
Link for Arya's Essay (Remembering "Tragedy Mei 1998")

Essay's from one of my best friends about the May Tragedy 1998.

Everytime... everytime I remember those damn days,-the demonstrations, the deaths, the chaos, the tear gas, the blank bullets, the real bullets, the burn, the friends, the panic, the destruction, etc-I've got a shiver.

Nice post bro', hope can make one too...

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Student's Checklist

The CBA Index: check
The Employment Forecast and Tax Revenue Forecast: check

Next: Spatial Statistic and Econometrics (The Paper)

GO GO WHITE SOX!

Sunday, May 07, 2006

*NOT FINISHED AND I'M TO LAZY TO FINISH IT ALERT*

Sometime I write something and hang in the middle of the story. Usually I just delay the writing, and I promised to myself to continue the writing. But after sometime, I'm not just in the mood to finish it, I even forget what I want to write (aahh, fuck it). Well, I don't want to delete it, but I don't want to see it laying at my posts, not published. Now I will post the example of this situation, maybe I will finish it later or maybe someone will have their own story to continue about this subject. For now, I don't really care.


Changes

*It is the end of the world (semester) as we know it.

Actually this essay was inspired by the people who are approaching the end of the semester, especially the one who will graduated next week. They are expecting changes, because they will left their comfort zone. Personaly, I don't believe, or at least I don't understand, about this comfort zone things, but I will follow this logic to analyze the changes that people are expecting. I will used first person experiences in this essay.

I nearly reach my 30 and married, and now still studying to pursue my PhD. Before I enrolled to the PhD program, I had passed my master program, my undergraduate program, and all previous schools before that. In between, I also worked as an assistant lecturer, a lecturer, and a researcher. If we use comfort zones thing, I've moved from comfort zone to another comfort zone quite often. Furthermore, with this logic, I predict I will have more comfort zones in the future, because I think comfort zone of a person is a function of time: the longer I lived, the more comfort zones I will have. If something is a function of time, then you will have little control over that. If I don't have control over something, then it will be futile to analyze that thing.

Now, I will talked about me. If I stroll through my city, Jakarta, I can see my elementary school, and my high school. The building hasn't changed much, many of the teacher already retired, some are still surviving, but again not many has changed during these last years (except the tuition fee, hahahaha). Although, I think I can't see any changes, because I don't really cared about happen in those school. Well, I passed it. Of course, we meet regularly with our friends, sometimes we meet with our teachers, but those are all we cared about.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Pesan dari Istriku "Beby's Sound Advice"

Setelah istri mendengar jawaban dari salah satu oknum dari sepasang manusia yang dimabuk cinta tetapi tidak mencoba untuk bersama. Maka beberapa saran2 dilontarkan oleh istriku.

"Kalo nggak mau dicoba, nggak bakal tahu. Kalo dicoba ada dua kemungkinan gagal atau berhasil, kalaupun gagal yang penting sudah mencoba. Kalo nggak dicoba mana tahu.

Namanya manusia yang penting berusaha mencoba, dan berdoa. Kalo gagal minta dikuatkan, kalo berhasil bersyukur, dan berbagai kebahagiaan dengan sanak saudara dan handai taulan, kita2 ini (contohnya dengan ditraktir), huahahahahaha.

Orang kalo menjajaki hubungan cinta mestinya dari sekolah, karena kalo dah kerja prioritasnya di dunia kerja dan pergaulan udah jadi prioritas yang kesekian. Kalo sudah kerja maka istilahnya waktu kita sudah dibeli oleh orang yang membayar. Kan enak tuh kenal kita pasangan kita saat belum apa2, masih tergantung dari orang tua, belum ada kedudukan. Jadi dimensi yang kita kenal lebih banyak, mungkin dari masih belum apa2, sampe menjadi semuanya. Kalo pacaran dari sekolah, pada masa2 paling indah saat tai kucing rasa coklat (it's so my wife, I love you luv), setiap perkembangan dimensinya bisa diketahui.

Ini sangat penting untuk pengenalan dan adaptasi. Kalo belum mau jadian, tapi mau komit dulu untuk saling mengenal, yah nggak masalah, bukan kartu mati kok, paling gagal, dan kita toh punya kesadaran bahwa bisa gagal. Karena orang tuh unik, kalo orang bisa cocok sama satu orang dan hidup dengannya selama 40 tahun kedepan (katanya di Alkitab umur manusia sekitar 60, kalo 70 udah bonus, di Mazmur katanya kalo nggak salah), yah kenapa mesti susah2 nunggu yang lain, belum tentu ada 2 atau 3 orang lainnya yang cocok kayak gituh selama hidupnya. Alasan dengan pertanyaan apakah dia orangnya, itu mah tugas kita untuk berusaha saling mengenal.

Apabila sudah bekerja, baru mencari yang cocok, biasanya orang jadi setengah mati dalam mencarinya. Karena pada saat mereka mencari2 yang cocok, waktu utama ditujukan untuk bekerja. Waktu untuk mencari yang cocok merupakan sisa dari prioritas waktu yang lain (bekerja), akibatnya susah konsentrasi untuk benar-benar mencari yang cocok. Kalau sambil lalu .... mmmmmm .... dapatnya juga yang 'sambil lalu' cocoknya.

Yang penting sih kata tante coba dulu, dengan mencoba memberi peluang 50% untuk berhasil, kalau sama sekali tidak mencoba memberi peluang 100% untuk gagal. Satu lagi kalo dia mencoba, berarti itu emang kemauan sendiri, bukan disuruh2 oleh orang lain, dan kemauan sendiri tuh penting. Emang gampang apah ketemu orang yang cocok."


Disclaimer: Mungkin orang lain bisa mendapat pencerahan dengan membaca tulisan diatas, tetapi maksud penulisan untuk sepasang manusia yang saling mencinta tapi memutuskan untuk tidak mencoba karena ada kemungkinan untuk berjauhan. Pake Skype duong, huehehehhehehe. Sekali lagi tidak dimaksudkan untuk umum, terutama bagi yang sudah melewati masa-masa sekolah, tetap semangat, huahahahahahhaha.
Wasted + dimarahin istri karena terlalu banyak minum

Hehehe, itu adalah status gue di Yahoo, karena semalem gue wasted abesshhh, sampe stomach pumping sampe pagi. Hehehehehe, tentu istri seperti biasa tahu (6th sense gituh deh), nah dimarahinlah saya, huhuhhuhuhu. Setelah saya dimarahi, dan istri sedang mengerjakan sesuatu, dalam keadaan kadar alkohol yang masih tinggi dalam darah, dan dalam rangka menenangkan istri, saya dan istri, membuat lagu-lagu yang kita sukai bersama, huehehehehhe. How about that, cool huh? :D

Berikut adalah lagu2 tersebut:

She oleh Elvis Costello: Waktu di Korea gue nyanyiin buat istri gue pas kita karaoke bareng, dan tentu dia juga tahu lagunya, salah satu lagu speak2 bau darah (istilah temen2 CC gue), huehehehehe. Sountrack Nottinghill...
She
May be the reason I survive
The why and wherefore I'm alive
The one I'll care for through the rough in ready years

Nuansa Bening oleh Keenan Nasution: Yah kita emang pasangan yang 80s gituh deh, jadi lagu2 tahun 80-an banyak yang jadi koleksi kita. Lagu ini adalah salah satu lagu yang keren,istri gue apal, gue senang lagunya nih. Menurut gue hampir semua cinta awalnya kayak ginih, huehehehehhe.

oh, tiada kejutan pesona diri
pertama kujabat jemari tanganmu
biasa saja
masa perkenalan lewatlah sudah
ada yang menarik bayang-bayangmu
tak mau pergi.

Fallen oleh Lauren wood: Nah itu salah satu lagu "kita" yang pertama-tama, eh kayaknya lagu yang pertama deh (detailed event is witheld, hueheheheh). Pas banget deh lagunya, pada saat itu. Soundtrack Pretty Woman...
And I was not looking, was content to remain.
And it's ironic to be back in the game.
You are the one who's led me to the sun.
How could I know that I was lost without you

Kau yang Terindah oleh Java Jive: Beberapa lagu-lagu kita ada dalam genre lagu yang isinya kekasih yang terpisah jarak, karena kita itungan masih commuting. Lagu ini gue suka banget, nah jadilah salah satu lagu kita, kata2nya itu lho, huehehehhe.
Kau yang terindah hadir dalam mimpiku
Kini bertemu dalam jalinan kisah
Mungkin kita bukan cinta, aku tak perduli
Tapi kita manusia yang punya hasrat jiwa

Can't Smile Without You oleh Carpenters: Ini lagunya istri gue, dia suka bener ama Carpenters, jadi yah gue jadi suka lagunya, iyahlah, I Can't Smile Without You gitu lho, judulnya ajah nendang bow...
You came along just like a song
You brightened my day
Who'd believe you were part of a dream
That only seemed light years away

Pergi untuk Kembali oleh Ello: Salah satu lagu baru yang disukai istri gue, katanya suaranya bagus, dan ini bagus buat gue, biar inget terus "hanya sekejap saja aku kan kembali lagi", sekali lagi ini genre kekasih yang terpisah, Indonesia banyak nih yang kayak gini2 nih.
Ku akan pergi meninggalkan dirimu
Menyusuri liku hidupku
Janganlah kau bimbang dan janganlah kau ragu
Berikanlah senyuman padaku

Better Together oleh Jack Johnson: lagu kita yang paling terakhir nih, pertama gue suka, terus dia suka, terus masing2 beli satu album (walaupun kabar terakhir CDnya dia diminta adek gue). Apapun yang kita lakukan, baik ketika kita mengejar karir sehingga harus berjauhan, atau berseteru ketika kita berdekatan, tetapi
I'll tell you one thing
It's always better when we're together

and we shall!

Selamat Jalan Kekasih oleh Chrisye: Yah semua orang seneng chrisye, kita pernah nonton konsernya bareng, kita banyak senang lagunya. Nah lagu ini dipilih karena lagi pas ajah, wong lagi jauhan. Kalo lagi deketan lagunya seringkali Malam Pertama kali yah, huahahhahahahha.
resah rintik hujan
yang tak mungkin menemani
sunyinya malam ini
sejak dirimu jauh dari pelukan

Sunday Morning oleh Maroon 5: Well, it's cool song, nice rhythm, and we always treasure sunday morning, when we often wake up to prepare ourself for church, breakfast, go to the mall, etc. Pokoknya hari santai bareng2 deh, sekali lagi salah satu hari yang paling gue rindukan bareng istri deh. Gue kutip deh lagunya hehehe...
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling and I’m calling out to you
Singing someday it’ll bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself home to you


Kangen oleh Dewa: Wah udah bosen ah, jelasin lagu2 kayak ginih, heheheh, tapi ini lagu dari judulnya ajah udah jelas, Leiden-Jakarta, Seoul-Jakarta, Champaign-Jakarta, lagu ini harus ada, kan kangen bow...
Kau bertanya padaku Kapan aku akan kembali lagi
Katamu kau tak kuasa Melawan gejolak didalam dada
Yang membara menahan rasa Pertemuan kita nanti
Saat kau ada disisiku

Somebody oleh Depeche Mode: One of the ultimate song, lagu speak2 bau darah sepanjang masa nih, gue rasa setidaknya lebih tinggi setingkat dari She oleh Elvis Costello. Boleh tanya temen2 gue deh, gimana efek lagu2 kayak ginih (ada suara jantungnya), ngeriiii...
I want somebody to share
Share the rest of my life
Share my innermost thoughts
Know my intimate details

Menikahimu oleh Kahitna: Istri gue fans beratnya Kahitna, kita harus ngejar kalo kahitna lagi manggung, kalo nggak, wuiihh bisa dimarahin gue, sebenernya gue sukanya pertunangan, tapi karena kebetulan nggak ada yah Menikahi ajah deh, kita suka juga kok lagunya, eh istri gue sih suka semua lagu Kahitna.
Menikah denganku
Menempatkan cinta
Melintasi perjalanan usia

If oleh Bread: Ini lagu klasik, yang artinya lagu lama, jadi gue dan istri gue udah tahu sebelumnya, dan ini lagu kayaknya okeh juga dimasukin genre kekasih yang terpisah, lagu ini menjadi klasik bukan tanpa alasan (lagu klasik speak2 bau darah), huehehehe.
And when my love for life is running dry,
You come and pour yourself on me.

Saya Kau Tak Disini (SKTD) oleh Jikustik: INi lagu keluar ketika hubungan Leiden-Jakarta, belum menikah, terus terang menurut gue lagu Jikustik emang agak menye2, tapi buat gue pas banget, kayak digebukin, sampe ngeri gue, hueheheheh. Terus setelah dia pulang kita nonton konsernya di HRC Thamrin, beberapa bulan kemudian nikah deh, huehehehe.
Saat kau tak ada
Atau kau tak disini
Terpenjara sepi
Kunikmati sendiri
Tak terhitung waktu
Tuk melupakanmu
Aku tak pernah bisa
Aku tak pernah bisa

Your Love is King oleh Sade: Istri gue sebagai salah satu bekas anggota dari paduan suara selalu bisa menilai suara2 yang bagus, nah ini adalah salah satu penyanyi dan lagu kesukaannya (nadanya santai membius), gue sih suka karena beken doang, eh gue suka juga karena istri gue suka duong, katanya ini lagunya buat gue, istri gue jago bener deh speak2 bauk darahnya, heheheh. Soundtrack Bridget Jones Diary...
our love is king
Crown you with my heart
Your love is king
Never need to part

Sweetest Thing oleh U2: Mau nunjukin ajah bahwa kita juga pasangan rock n' roll, video klipnya bagus nih (bagus bener deh), lagunya bagus, ini lagu cinta yang buat orang babak belur, but still the sweetest thing, heheheh, ampun Mas Bono.
You know I got black eyes
But they burn so brightly for her
This is a blind kind of love
Oh oh oh, the sweetest thing

The Nearness of You oleh Diana Krall: Leiden-Jakarta lagi nih, waktu dia nonnton North sea Jazz gituh deh, karena dia udah nonton North Sea Jazz gituh deh, sedangkan gue belum, dan itu salah satu cita-cita gue gituh. Gue dikirimin CD edisi khususnya North Sea Jazz, dan ini adalah salah satu lagu yang enak penyanyinya, gue nonton loh konsernya di Indonesia, dan lagunya emang klasik, merinding denger lagu ini....
It's not the pale moon that excites me
That thrills and delights me, oh no
It's just the nearness of you
It isn't your sweet conversation
That brings this sensation, oh no
It's just the nearness of you


Okeh, udah. Kenapa ada 17 lagu, karena di itunes, kalo mau dibakar ke CD audio yang bisa dimainin di CD player cuman 17 lagu maksimal. Akhirnya gue dan istri gue tidur dengan tenang...

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Student's Checklist

The Stella Project and Presentation: (Check)

Next: Spatial Statistics & Econometrics Paper

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Spring in St. Louis


*Selamat datang ke Arch, perkenalkan kameraman amatir, huehehehe

Hmmm, istri gue kembali mengatakan bahwa blog gue kurang foto, jadi kayak kurang hiasan. Sekali lagi sesuai titah istri tercinta maka gue akan memasang foto2. Karena gue emang nggak punya kamera jadi gue emang kurang moto2, tetapi setelah gue liat2 ternyata gue punya foto jalan2 yang okeh banget gituh deh, hehehehe. Nah itu yang gue akan tunjukkan disini. Silahkan menikmati.


*Old Courthouse, the Arch, and the three of us


*Gue dan "latar belakang" gue yang keren, eh itu guenya lagi yang keren

Wah kemaren gue ama Ardi dan Lia jalan ke St. Louis, berhubung pada mau refreshing dulu sebelum ujian kali, sama mau menikmati musim semi yang indah dan tempat baru, maka kita jalan2 kesana. Sebenernya ini kali kedua gue kesana, waktu itu ama Teja, Ajeng dan Yudi. Tapi temen2 gue yang lain belum, jadi gituh deh jalan2 kita. Sebenernya Ajeng mau ikut, tapi dia sibuk banget gituh deh seperti biasa, ada kerjaan yang tiba2 dateng deh. Pokoknya akhirnya kita cuman betiga.


*Nongkrong2 ajah gituh di tangga karena ada yang mau motoin


orang dari timur, dengan latar sungai yang menjadi pintu ke daerah barat

St. Louis adalah salah satu kota tua, dimana dia terkenal dengan archnya yang melambangkan gate to the west. Karena dulu menjadi pintu gerbang orang2 yang mau ke daerah barat, ketika daerah tersebut belum terlalu terbuka. Jadi Lewis and Clark memulai perjalanan ke barat melalu tempat ini. Untuk menghormati itu maka dibangun arch.


*calon temen seapartemen gue, cakepkan, eh masih cakepan gue sih


*Eh cantik juga nih yang ikut2an foto bareng gue, hueheheh, kayaknya, kayaknya nih, calonnya calon temen seapartemen gue, eh, ooppss

Nah perjalan pertama gue kesana tuh waktu spring, dimana udah gelap di jam2 sore, dan udara dingin jadi kita yang perlu2 ajah, alias cuman arch dan sekitarnya (tempat moto di depan old courthouse) dan mall tempat makan di Landrys. Pokoknya kita berusaha untuk lama2an di dalem ruang, namanya juga dingin, terus kalo bisa, kemana2 naik mobil gituh.


*Harus agak mundur nih motonya, karena duduknya jauh2an, tapi okeh jugalah gayanya, kayak gimanah gituh


*A: Kemana kita harus melangkah yah, kayaknya perjalanannya masih jauh.
B: yah nggak papakan, bareng ini.


Di perjalanan kedua ini di musim semi, maka waktu terang jadi sangat panjang jadi kita bsia dengan santainya melihat keliling, nongkrong2, duduk2, sama jalan2. Jadi kita masuk ke dalam arch, eh kita nggak naik karena udah tutup, gue lupa tutupnya jam 6, heheheheh. Terus kita keluar duduk di tangga, terus ke sungai bentar, dan dan jalan ke tempat foto arch yang disarankan yudis. Setelah itu anak2 muda ini, temen2 gue, memutuskan untuk jalan ke mall. Buset berapa belas blok tuh udah kita lewatin, karena gue males untuk jalan, perasaan gue naik mobil waktu itu mayan lama. Yah anak2 muda semangat muda, akhirnya jalan kita. Ternyata tempat yang kita lewatin bagus, enak buat jalan, enak buat motret2, dan lain sebagainya. Wah yah enak deh jalan-jalan sore bareng mereka, apalagi kayaknya mereka, eh gue ngomonga apa lagi, udah ahhh.


Karikaturkita dan kita, mirip semua yah


if a picture paints thousand words -lagunya Bread nih yang judulnya If

Terus kita ke mall, belanja2 dikit, terus beli fudge yang sampai saat ini masih bersisa di rumah gue. Beli tiga gratis satu, empat2nya di rumah gue. Katanya fudgenya kemanisan, kalo pahit mah makan buat maja ajah kan pahit tuh, payah daahhhh. Akhirnya kita makan di Landrys, dan kita makan di luar, di pinggir kolam, wah sedep bener dah, mana makanannya dan makanan penutupnya enak2. Dari semua yang paling susah adalah mesen makanan pembuka, lama deh, tapi luncang bambang bow, huahahahahahha. Setelah itu akhirnya kita balik, hueheheheh.


*Bertapa... nggak sih, yang moto kagak liat2 gue lagi merem atau nggak, ah padahal latar belakang dan posenya udah asik berat beng beng gituh deh, hueheheh



*Di depan St. Louis Union Station yang udah jadi pusat perbelanjaan

Perjalanan balik, gue ditelpon ama temen kita yang nggak bisa ikut, diajak ke Chicago minggu depan, tapi barengnya pas pergi dan pulang doang, wadddd???!! Emang mau ngapain sih diantaranya? hhmmm, gelap... Gue ngomongin apa yah barusan, wah gue mabuk nih, huahahahahha.


*A: Eh gimana2? Eh, kok kita harus sok liat2 ke arah arch yah, biar nggak ketahuan ngomong apa yah?
B: Apa sih Paks?



di depan tempat makan kita, Landrys, eh jeans gue kok bolong yah? Eh ini kayaknya beli bareng istri gue deh? Kapan yah belinya? Hehhehe, yang di PRJ kayaknya, atau Bandung...

Terima Kasih atas Perhatiannya...

Monday, May 01, 2006

Me and You and Everyone We Know

Itu adalah judul film independen yang baru gue, Ange dan Ardi tonton beberapa saat lalu. Hmm, sebenernya mungkin nggak ada hubungannya dengan tulisan ini, tetapi karena gue nggak tahu judul lain untuk tulisan ini maka gue jadiin judul. Yang namanya film independen, yah menghiburnya juga independen, menghibur seenak2nya ajah, jadi yang terhibur juga independen, suka sukur, nggak suka yah bebas, hehheheheh.

Nah sekarang untuk isi tulisan ini adalah hasil kebosanan gue yang sudah bosen nulis tentang diri sendiri gue yang emang narsis, tetapi lebih cinta ama istri daripada diri sendiri (tuhkan narsis lagi, huehehehe). Anyhoo, gimana kalo gue tulis tentang orang lain, kan enak tuh ngomongin orang lain (pasti udah ada yang mulai deg2an deh huehehehe, bagus emang harus gituh!), soalnya dosa katanya ngomongin orang, dan dosa biasanya enak2 gituh. Nah anggap Me-nya gue, You-nya loe-loe yang baca, dan Everyone We Know adalah temen imaginer gue yang kesannya loe2 tahu. Gue harap setelah gue cerita loe berasa kenal ajah ama orangnya hehehehe.

Hhmm gimana ngomongnya yah, well, kayaknya awal musim semi ini emang cocok kayaknya kalo untuk berindehoi2an. Gue sendiri nggak pernah terlalu peduli masa musim semi ini, tetapi istri gue seneng banget ama musim semi, sampe rencana awal kawinnya kalo bisa di musim semi, padahal kawinnya di Indonesia, tapi karena permintaan istri gue mah nurut. Tapi akhirnya kita kawin di Desember, kebetulan musim yang gue suka, Natal, Tahun Baru, ultah gue, deket ultah istri gue, musim buah2 yang enak, dan lain2 sebagainya, hahahahahha.

Nah musim semi kedua gue di UIUC, gue merasa mulai ketularan istri gue yang suka musim semi, mungkin karena rindu ama istri, mungkin karena temen2 gue yang juga menikmati musim seminya. Terus terang kalo musim semi disini, terutama bulan Mei, berarti saatnya kuliah mau selesai, tugas2 harus dikumpulkan, ujian akhir, dan lain2 sebagainya. Selain itu saatnya bagi yang udah mau lulus, biasanya s1 sama s2 lulusnya bulan2 ini, untuk bersiap2 mencari kerjaan, bersiap2 membereskan barang2nya untuk pulang atau pindah, atau mungkin ada yang pulang pokoknya siap2 mau pergi dari kota pelajar ini dah. Sehingga semua sibuk2 gituh deh.

Selain sibuk2, mungkin karena kesibukan dengan semua mulai berkurang, mulai keliatanlah kesibukan2 yang suka datang tiba2, yang biasa dikesampingkan tetapi selalu mengganggu, yang biasa ditunda2 tetapi selalu menteror, itu adalah kesibukan sayang2an, ahhhh. Pada saat ini, ketika baju mulai baju musim semi atau musim panas, orang2 dapat melangkah dengan ringan, mereka banyak tertawa2, tanpa takut muka mereka beku, maka keceriaan itu muncul. Bunga2 juga bermunculan, walaupun hanya sekejap, tapi gue rasa itu sudah cukup merasuki jiwa manusia-manusia untuk kembali menganggumi keindahan, hehehhehe.

Jadi yah, gue lihat temen2 gue yang mayan deket, kayaknya, kayaknya lho nih, pada lagi menikmati musim semi nih. Hhhhmmm, yah tentunya saya ikut seneng gituh deh, tapi karena temen2 gue tuh orangnya galak2 semua (baik cewek2 atau cowok-->jamak dan tunggal, hmmmm), jadi yahhh, jadi gue nanya nanti tanya ajah sekalian semuanya, hueheheheh. Aduh ceritanya gimana yah nanti dimarahin lagi, tapi lucu deh, yah istilah temen gue Petris pada lagi seneng besukaan gituh deh. Tapi orang2 yang pinter kalo besukaan mikirnya kayaknya kebanyakan, padahal sih menurut gue sih gampang ikutan ajah napsunya kemana, iyah nggak a?, udah gedekan? udah tahu resiko, .rock on!!! Hehehhehe.

Jadi temen2 imaginer gue, yah everyone we know itu, sepertinya lagi berbunga2 gituh, istilahnya Mas Mus Mudjiono, inikah tanda2nya bunga asmara, mulai bersemi, mulai bersemi sekali lagi... Wih pasti Mas Mus pernah sekolah di luar negeri deh, soalnya ada bunga2 bersemi. Setahu gue di Indonesia, bunga bersemi2 terus, heheheheheh. Setidaknya banyakan ijonya deh di indonesia. Gue sebenernya ngomong muter2 ini karena berusaha menghindari pembicaraan, tapi gini deh, para pembaca (you) kalo bisa ikut2an deh untuk saling besuka2an, karena lagi bulannya deh. Terus ada Everyone we Know yang ada di negara bagian lain di bawah gue, kembali dengan semangat meminta kenal2an dari beberapa temannya untuk diselidiki. Wah pokoknya masa2 penuh cinta deh.

Kalo yang disini, gue menikmati kerinduan gue, sambil melihat love is all around. Walaupun kata everyone we know, belum tentu cinta, tapi hareee geenneee, fiuh. Dari dulu selalu ada pertanyaan apakah sesuatu dibuat atau ditemukan, seperti apakah pimpinan itu dilahirkan atau dibuat. Hmmm, ini mungkin sama kayak pertanyaan apakah cinta itu made (dibuat) atau found (ditemukan). Well, karena gue udah dipengaruhi dengan hal-hal yang pragmatis, maka gue kutip kata2 Richard Rorty dalam bahasa Inggris:
"For we have no use for the reality-appearence distinction, anymore than for the distinction between the found and the made. We hope to replace the reality-appearance distinction with the distinction between the more useful and the less useful."

"... pragmatist think that the question to ask about our belief is not whether they are about reality or merely about appearance, but simply whether they are the best habits of action for gratifying our desires.


Pokoknya nikmatin ajah deh, yeaahhhh...
Jadi seperti yang pernah dikatakan orang2 di jamannya... ROCK ON!!!
Last Week of My Third Semester: Output and State of Being

Okey in this semester, although the output is larger, I'm less productive than my two previous semester in term of hour per output. I'm getting lazier, it felt like I can finish all the work in the given time, well actually I did most of it, but that's not what I want. I want discipline, work around the clock, time management, and all other fucking work ethics that I learnt from the famous people, books, or movies.

Now, I'm degraded to the state of survival, which actually the state where I often found myself. In junior high and high school, I learnt how to survive, who cares about getting the best grade, who cares about being number one, who cares about getting the best of the best. Only in the last two years of my high school, and in a couple semesters in University (undergraduate and graduate), and when I worked, I upgraded myself to the state of growing. It pays, but along the way, when I reached my goal, I returned to the survival state.

Anyhoo, I hate myself because I haven't yet finish a paper to be presented or published in a journal. This is "the thing" that I really care. If I manage to finish one paper, it will elevated me to the state of growing, and who knows, to the state of growing fast.

I hope in the summer I will finish the draft for my paper.

When the choices for my activity are enormous, I always remember my old poster of Chairil Anwar cool face who is smoking; and a slogan is written in the bottom of the poster: "Sekali Berarti Sesudah Itu Mati", I won't translate it, because I'm lazy, hahahahha (I think all the readers are Indonesian, hey, why I wrote in this stupid language, damn). Then, I dropped everything else, except one or two activities.

Salute for Chairil Anwar